Showing posts from November, 2015

She's Just Getting Her MRS

The title of this article is an old fashioned term that refers to a woman attending college just to nab a good husband instead of out of a sincere desire for a degree and a career. Linguistically, it is a play on expressions like "Getting a BA" (Bachelor of Arts) or "Getting an MS." (Master of Science).

It's a fairly dismissive thing to say, and, to the best of my knowledge, it has some ugly assumptions baked into it. Some of those assumptions seem to be:
A woman who gets an education and ends up being a full time wife and mom derives no benefit out of attending college other than optimizing her chances to meet a prospective husband with a well-paid professional career ahead of him instead of some working Joe.A woman with real career aspirations can't be convinced to get married and support a man's career, in spite of enormous and overwhelming societal and logistical pressures that made it easier to be a full time wife and mom than a professional woma…

How to Make a PayPal Tip Jar

The instructions here were updated and moved to my new project Independent Digital Workers on November 30, 2017.
(This post is a follow up to:Surviving and Thriving Amidst The Adblocker Wars)

It's your fault if your employees are stepping out on you

Over the years, I have run into at least a couple of women whose husband's had been unfaithful to them. Invariably, these women seemed to assume I should side with them, apparently simply because I am also female. (Some women seem to assume that all women are part of the Man Haters for Life Club. Sorry, I failed to sign up for that one.)

If I listened to them long enough, I eventually learned that these women were routinely refusing to have sex with their man and then vilifying him when he decided to get his needs met elsewhere. When I worked for a Fortune 500 company, I couldn't help but think of those women every fall when Overtime Season rolled around.

Overtime Season typically started around September and ended around the end of December. The people in charge of my department would watch the work pile up all summer and do nothing about it. Then, when it hit some particular level that they felt was unacceptable, they would announce that we were required to work overtime. (…

Not really rude

I was sexually abused as a child. (I am quite open about that fact. Sorry if that is shocking news to you.) In order to recover, I have done a lot of reading, journaling, therapy, etc to sort things out. Here are a few things I have learned:
Sexual predators do not start with rape. They start by trampling your boundaries in small ways and gradually escalating things until you are the perfect mark. In most cases, only after you have been shaped into a good, cooperative victim who is likely to keep their mouth shut and cover up the crime does it finally culminate in rape. 
In a word, they start with disrespecting you. They expect you to go along in order to not be "rude." By the time something clearly bad has happened, the victim feels complicit and will tend to also look complicit to others should they need to testify as to what happened. It will be very hard to prove they were victimized. 
This seems to largely hold true whether the victim is a child or a grown woman. 
One …

A woman rants about man bashy stuff written by "women in tech"

I wish women would make more of an effort to understand why men do what they do. Here is my general take on it: The Gray Zone

I am certainly frustrated and angry. I am also currently quite poor, and I feel the fact that my gender makes it difficult to network contributes to that, so when well paid women with tech jobs write about their complaints, it often just gets on my nerves. They are not typically struggling to survive. Their complaints often strike me as "first world problem, lol" type material, over which they are apparently thoroughly enraged.

One woman in tech that I was briefly following shared a link to an old article of hers with a trigger warning for sexual assault. After reading it, I was deeply offended that she had used a trigger warning.

The piece in question detailed how some guy had brushed up against her (breasts, iirc) a few times on crowded public transportation under circumstances where she wasn't initially sure herself if she was being intention…

Surviving and Thriving Amidst The Adblocker Wars

In recent weeks, I have been following the discussion on Hacker News about the ad-blocker wars with interest. Here is an example of what I am talking about:

This is the HN Discussion of the article The Devastating Effect of Ad-Blockers for

The short version of the article is that their income has been cut in half in the previous year or so due to ad blocking and they are thus in dire financial straits because of it. Here is an excerpt of their closing remarks:

Our pledge: we do not serve intrusive ads like pop-downs/pop-ups and takeovers. We serve common ads, mostly targeted and matched at your interests and PC gaming / hardware.

Please whitelist in Adblock Plus
Go to www.Guru3D.comClick on the AdBlock Plus icon in your browserClick on "Enabled for this site" to switch Adblock Plus towards "Disabled for this site" Our friendly request: Please, seriously please start white-listing the domain in your ad-blockers as slowly but stead…